The author says:
Target audience: Adults and kids who like color and clean humour. I have implemented many of the changes suggested here, as they were very good ideas. I am also considering the following title changes. Again, my objective is to cause a browser to open the book to see if he or she wants to buy it. In your view, will it have this effect? Possible title/subtitle combos include: 1) Title: The ART of the Unwashed Masses Sub: Art and Humour for the common man 2) Title: Art and Humour Sub: A visual Guide to the Curves of Life 3) Title: The ART of the Unwashed Masses Sub: Cautionary tales to guide the common man 4)(current post) Title: Art and Humour Sub: The Illustrated Adventures of a Roving Artist Or any combination of the above. Your thoughts, and new ideas, are much appreciated, Will
[Original submission and comments here]
Nathan says:
That’s the one weak point of this kind of crowdsourced critique: You’ll get differing, and sometimes contradictory advice. Here’s mine:
I don’t like the title featured here. I know some people had problems with the original title (I was not one of them); I think that this one is far too generic. I also realize that you’re limited in your ability to retitle, as the word “Art” is part of the artwork and you have to work the rest of the title around it.
And your name could be bigger still. Self-publishing is not a venue in which modesty is a virtue!
I’ll leave it to others to debate the options for your new title.
I don’t like the addition of the paintbrush and the pencil behind the ears. It doesn’t really like the art to the title any better than before, and they look out of place. If you want to keep that idea I suggest having some art supplies falling out the side of the car, maybe a trail of papers down the road in the air even.
I agree with Nathan, the big empty space before ‘Art’ is off putting because ‘and humour’ is left justified. You would either need to add some letters before Art, or move the rest of it to the right to even it out.
The word ‘humour’ breaks the fall of ‘art’ on the couple below – so the peril aspect is lost
It’s certainly an improvement! The artwork and the title are finally mutually relevant.
The main problems lie with placement, as others have pointed out.
Perhaps you could move your name into the space to the left of “Art.” This would also make the area beneath the woman empty and a little more perilous-looking.
I would also try to do something about the break in the subtitle. Placing “artist” on its own line makes the subtitle read oddly.
Err…I’m in the other camp. I liked the original title better. “Art and humor,” as a title, doesn’t demonstrate any humor, or any character at all.
For titles, I’d say a more whimsical one that captures the humor (or “humour” if this is being published in the UK) and fits the picture would be Art: Taking It On The Road.
Center that title, and no further description is necessary. That leaves more room on the cover for your name as well.
Thanks again to each of you who left comments. They are much appreciated, and invaluable to me. They allow me to see the weak areas of the design and find solutions or compromises. Your comments help me know what the problems might be.
Nathan – I can retitle all I want. I drew the cliff to begin with and can redraw it easily, thanks to digital. I will probably go with “The ART of the Unwashed Masses.” This identifies me as the unwashed, which is good because people love to laugh down at the other guy. Once I get them to look inside, the cover has done its job.