Survival of the Fittest

Covers

[Edit: The first cover I had here was sent to me in error; the better cover is below.  Comments are pretty much the same.]

The authors say:

A book for business owners or managers which presents an unusual approach to the dog-eat-dog mentality. One chapter is how to avoid creating zombie employees, another that the leadership structure shouldn’t be top down but more like the flexibility of an amoeba. We hope the cover suggests a different and better approach to making a profit and developing people.

 

SurvivalCoverdraftV3

SurvivalCoverdraftV3

Nathan says:

I always like to start my critique by commenting on what’s already there, but… there isn’t much there.  This is the kind of cover you might use for a captive audience — a textbook, maybe, for a class taught by the authors — but it’s definitely not a marketing instrument, which is what a commercial cover should be.

You use plenty of interesting metaphors and references in your title, subtitle and description: “survival of the fittest,” “Darwinian,” “dog-eat-dog,” “zombie,” “amoeba.”  I don’t know how light or colloquial the actual text is, but if it matches the images those words put into my head, then you could definitely have fun with this. Have a T-Rex wearing a conservative tie and holding an iPad! Zombies around the water cooler! An amoeba with black-rimmed glasses and a pocket protector!  Yes, this is custom art we’re talking about, but given that it lends itself well to cartoonish line drawings, I think you could wave a couple hundred dollars in front of a webcartoonist like Carter Reid or David Malki and get something that just oozes with awesome.

If, on the other hand, you’ve got a more serious book behind this cover — punctuated by some interesting metaphors, but not as lighthearted as I assumed above — then you could still bring those metaphors to the cover.  A solid, dependable font like Trajan, surrounding a posterized silhouette of a T-Rex, would still give enough of an eye-catching appeal while not misleading readers on the tone of the book inside.

(Why a T-Rex, and not just better versions of the fish you have? Well, which do you think is more attention-grabbing? I thought so.)

What do other people think?

 

Patchwork Brothers: Bandits in Burlap

Covers

The author says:

This is a super early draft cover, but I’m drawing a complete blank. It’s for a kids chapter book about a mysterious quilt that takes a pair of brothers back to the wild west. They have to face off with outlaws and skeptical lawmen to find a way back home. I’m drawing a blank at balancing the handmade “quilty” elements with the rough and tumble nature of the two protagonists. I ended up with a fantastic cover from last book’s critique so bring it on, I can take it.

Patchwork Roughest Draft.JPG

Patchwork Roughest Draft.JPG

 

Nathan says:

Yowch. I’m glad you said you can take it, because you’re gonna get it with this one. But at least you admit that you’re drawing a blank.

I think you need to go to the bookstore or library and take a good look at the popular chapter books.  Here are the things I see as being common elements:

  • Colorful artwork with semi-cartoony exaggeration.
  • Characters that young readers can instantly identify as relatable protagonists.
  • Type that’s bold and sometimes fancy, but always readable for people who haven’t mastered (and may never HAVE to master) cursive script.

Now, what I’m about to suggest may be beyond your skillset, but you do what’s necessary to market the book:

If you want to keep the quilt motif, let it be the WHOLE cover. Make the individual quilt squares big enough that you can show the protagonists themselves in the squares in a scene from the book, or at least a situation indicative of the story (maybe have two or three squares which are all part of the same image, even though they’re separated).  Render the quilt in deep enough colors that you can use bordered light type for the title and byline and have it stand out.

Marketing to young readers is a specialized skill, in your target audience isn’t going to “get” subtleties of typeface, color scheme, etc., which designers for adult books can often rely on in place of a full illustration.  You very well might need to partner with a professional illustrator to get it how you want it.  (I actually know someone with reasonable rates who might just be the person for you — let me know if you’re interested.)

Other insights?

The Queen’s Viper

Covers

The author says:

Hatred prowls the streets of London, and her name is Viper. Ancient and wicked, Viper feeds on human aeir, the magical energy that connects people to everything. She discovered the unique power of Princess Elizabeth’s aeir by accident. Viper put Elizabeth on the English throne to sustain herself and find her past. When Viper uncovered her kin, she discovered an enemy with enough power to trap her for 400 years. In 2012, something releases her from her bonds. Aided by her Foundling, Mouse, and a group of humans selected by him, Viper seeks revenge on her foe and the descendants of those who imprisoned her…starting with Queen Elizabeth II. Lesley Donaldson’s re-imagines Celtic mythology into an urban fantasy unlike any fairy tale you’ve read before.

Queen's Viper first draft cover

Queen's Viper first draft cover

Nathan says:

I like the file name of the image you sent me: “Queen’s Viper first draft cover.jpg.”  First drafts are great for throwing ideas out and seeing how they stick.

My first observation is that the art is a little shaky — not terrible, but definitely less than confident. (I’m speaking here from experience — I can turn out a sketch that looks great, but when I go back to finish the details, I get stuck on the nostrils and the lips and having the two eyes match, all the same trouble areas I see here.)  Unfortunately, the white space around it means that the face has to carry the entire cover, and it’s just not up to it.

White space is its own problem.  A lot of books, especially “grimdark” fantasy novels, have put it to good use recently, but it does bring its own particular problems. You’ll notice that most of the books using a white background (a) have high-contrast, almost chiaroscuro artwork, and (a) use asymmetrical layout to keep it visually interesting. Unfortunately, yours does neither — the white space comes across as simply unused, rather than an intentional part of the design.

My suggestion, if you’re going to stick with the same artwork (even if it’s refined): Put the face to one side, making it less symmetrical, and let the type carry more of the weight of communication: make it not only bigger, but more evocative.

Other ideas?

Check out Corp-ID-Theory

Admin Stuff

cropped-wordpress-masthead4[1]
While you’re waiting for the next critiquable cover to show up here, you could check out Corp-ID-Theory, a cool new blog by Michael Shumate. why yes, we are related; in fact, he’s my father.  And whereas I’m a largely self-taught designer who proceeds by gut feeling and tries to justify it afterward, Dad is an honest-to-goodness retired professor of graphic design.  His new blog is all about branding design, and if you think that’s a field unrelated to book cover design, you definitely need his blog.

We Can’t Rewind [resubmit]

Covers

The author says:

The newlywed Don and Denise Richards get their minds swapped with those of his son Jackie and her daughter Jaymee respectively while their Caribbean honeymoon cruise is lost in the Bermuda Triangle. No matter what they try, they can’t seem to find a way to swap back! Now what will they do? “We Can’t Rewind” is the latest prospective title for this paranormal romance. (Before you ask, yes, that’s from the lyrics of “Video Killed The Radio Star” by the Buggles, though it has only the most tenuous association with this story.) The prospects of coming to an agreement with traditional publishers so far are looking rather poor, so it seems I will have to design and publish the whole book myself; I still plan to get a professional artist to redraw the final cover, however.

We Can't Rewind Scratch

We Can't Rewind Scratch

[previous submissions and comments here and here]

Nathan says:

The cover is definitely evolving. Much clearer, brighter, easier to process.

That said, it’s still not sitting right with me somehow. It’s a (very strange) love story, but I don’t get that from the cover. I’m guessing from the description that there’s a certain amount of wacky comedy a la Freaky Friday, but I also don’t see that in the cover.

You said that, as independent publishing is looking more likely, you “plan to get a professional artist to redraw the final cover.”  May I suggest that a professional graphic artist or designer is worth more than his ability to draw what you tell him?  You seem very attached to using certain elements to market your story, but maybe you should have a graphic professional read the first few chapters and tell you how he would market your story.  You might be surprised (pleasantly).

Other comments?