Shadow Magic

The author says:

Paranormal Romance Mystery with light humor (readership age: new adult, adult, upper-YA)

Nathan says:

Bullseye. The only thing I would do is remove/darken the glow around her head so that her hair doesn’t blend into the background.

Other comments?

Comments

  1. Nice job! Excellent!

    I agree with Nathan, though, that the girl’s hair does tend to blend into the background a little. And while you are at it, you might want to differentiate the color of the vapor/flame coming from the bottle from the color of her hair a little more.

    A little shadow cast from her arm onto the Ouija board would help make the different parts of the figure work together better as a whole.

    The only thing that really immediately bothered me is the sameness of all of those bits and pieces of paper (or whatever it is). They are all too much the same size. If you were to vary their sizes a little more it would not only add some variety to the picture but more depth as well since everything won’t seem to be on the same plane.

    These are all just pretty minor things in an otherwise nicely done cover.

  2. The concept is dead-on, but I think it needs some refinements:

    -Her blank expression is very jarring with the playful look of the rest of the cover. She should have a mischievous expression instead of a vacant one.

    -There are some shadows missing–her arm should cast a shadow on the book and her hair should cast a shadow on her neck, for instance.

    -The white outline around the figure is distracting to me.

    -I realize the fonts are supposed to be whimsical, but to me it’s too much. You don’t want to be evoking Curlz MT.

    (And as a final note, a reminder that new adult/adult/YA is not a thing. These are different genres with different design requirements.)

    1. I would definitely say that this seems far more YA than NA. YA is considered to be 13 to 18; New Adult is considered 18-25, up to 30. This seems far too youthful to be NA, to my eyes. She’s clearly in an academy/school of some kind, not out of college and earning a living, which tends to be the YA reading material age, or at the very least, college-age.

      For a change, Gwen, I don’t really mind that font, for this book, and this cover. It seems okay. (And also, BTW, reinforces that “YA” not “NA” age grouping.)

      1. The neon colors and whimsical fonts actually make me think middle grade, YA tending to prefer the dark and gritty look for contemporary fantasy.

        1. Gwen:

          Yes, I’d agree with that on the coloration front, but the author didn’t give us that as an alternative. She seems to be saying teenagers–>older.

          Also, the girl on the cover has boobage, which tends not to be Middle Grade reading age. {shrug}. Dunno, but I hope she sorts it out. Lumping together all those reading ages, when they are well and truly discrete won’t work well.

  3. Really professional looking cover, pitches very well for genre and audience on the whole. Does a really good job of getting across the right idea and looking slick at a glance.

    It could just benefit from the tweaks Nathan, Ron and Gwen have already mentioned.

    Re. the title treatment: like Gwen said, I’d potentially question the font. It looks apropriate to a younger-skewing YA but you mention older YA as the genre of this. I think you could find something that feels a little more fitting for that.

    I’d also add a couple more notes…

    – I have only just realised that the thing the girl is carrying is supposed to be a book, and the pages in the air have come from it. I’m afraid that part isn’t working, the angle and perspective is off. It doesn’t ruin the cover because you get the idea of something occult (maybe a Ouija board like Ron said) but worth looking at.

    – It bothers be that the gate isn’t centrally placed as it’s face-on and it’s otherwise a completely centrally-oriented cover.

    I can see why you’ve placed the bg image as you have, so the shape of the school building isn’t hidden behind the girl, but I think with a touch of tweking and maybe resizing of the bg you would get it central.

    – Finally I’d consider using a couple of touches of a colour outside the blue/green spectrum. Something sharply contrasting would really make the cover pop. At present, at thumnail, evry merges a bit and the eye easily passes over it. A contrasting colour can be used to make a key detail or two really catch the eye.

    E.g. here I’ve spent a few seconds adding some purple into the text elements and alongside the original you can see how you immediately get more deapth and sharpness. https://nestofstraightlines.tumblr.com/private/185359344221/tumblr_psklbzzeox1rv70iu

  4. It’s got the right general kinds of illustrations for the genre, but some of the specifics on this cover are rather lacking. Specifically:

    1. Some of the pages fluttering around the girl have clearly been cloned, especially the ones in the upper right and lower right corners.

    2. The image of the girl is just kind of flat all around; as Katz notes, not enough shadows in the proper places, her expression is awfully blank, and her arm holding the board is also at a slightly unnatural angle, all of which suggests certain parts of her have been cut-and-pasted from elsewhere.

    3. Who curls her fingers around the base of a vase that way? This is one more subtle betrayal of the cut-and-paste nature of this cover: by the configuration of her hand, she apparently ought to be holding a baton or a test tube or a light saber hilt or something else roughly cylindrical in it, not a vase.

    In short, you’ve got a workable storyboard draft for your cover here, but I recommend using a picture of an actual girl holding the actual objects (or something very like them) for this cover rather than this patchwork gal you’ve got right now.

  5. I always thought ‘adult’ fantasy wars classified properly simply as ‘fantasy’ or ‘general fantasy.’ I would classify book series like ‘The Chronicles of Amber’ and ‘The Wheel of Time’ as regular fantasy. That’s how they’re classified in general, and the covers in those series and ‘Oathbringer’ of the ‘Stormlight Archive are quite whimsical.

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